Deviant Dispatches

Sally Anns are one of my favorite cookies. By their taste alone, they evoke a sense of home and comfort, reminding me of the kitchen at my grandparents' place and the simple happiness of mid-afternoon sweets. They're the only food that evokes the thought, This would be better with a cup of coffee. Making them was a good Easter activity, especially as I was stuck away from the family due to unpacking (the books are now free!) and yard work shenanigans (such as finding a dead mouse in the yard, which was lovely). With help from my mom, I found the recipe in the family cookbook (my great-great-grandparents are on the cover, and other awesome old pictures are scattered throughout). I decided that the transgression of buying a can of Spam (just once) was worth it for the sake of the cookies. Poke holes in the bottom of the can to allow for air flow. I didn't have enough butter for a full batch, but half of one made 18 Cookies of Unusual Size. I made the mistake of...

Dear Former House Owners, I'd like to thank you for the following items you so kindly decided to bequeath to us, for whatever reason. Patio table with six chairs Fire pit Seven-foot metal windmill that makes me hear this in my head Framed photo of the backyard in summer, to taunt us in this false spring Moon-shaped hanging candle holder Several children's art projects behind the closet door, as well as a Buzz Lightyear poster Child's skis and ski poles, abandoned on a top shelf in basement storage Hot pink Victoria's Secret robe, made with the tears of Sri Lankan children Random chunks of asphalt in the yard A furnace fan that will not shut up What I assume is at least eight years worth of dust I have to admit, it's weird to think about these things as though you left them to us on purpose. It's also awkward to think of you leaving them accidentally--or for any reason. Here's how I imagine some of your conversations going. Left on Purpose ...