The Very Virile Viking by Sandra Hill
The Very Virile Viking is a real book. By a real romance author, who apparently doesn't care about pretending to be historically accurate anymore; she just wants to get to the good stuff. The first line of this book? "In the days of old when men were... whatever..."
I think this review sums it up much better than I could. I especially like the euphemism the reviewer points out: "It was not yet spring, but his sap was running high." Oh myyyyy.
Our next awful book title features...
Pregnesia by Carla Cassidy
...Okay. No. I give up on this one. It's too easy.
(Just let me say that either this is a condition where you forget how you got pregnant in the first place, or the lady's birthing a planet. Now I'm moving on.)
We all know Harlequins are absolute crap. Here are some more wonderful baby-related tales from the best-known romance publisher in the world.
Virgin Mistress, Scandalous Love-Child by Jennie Lucas
The Greek Tycoon's Pregnant Wife by Anne Mather
The Future King's Pregnant Mistress by Penny Jordan
I am now convinced that Harlequin just does a find-and-replace to publish new books. Let's play that game, shall we? Using the Random Word Generator and the format "adjective, possessive noun, pregnant, noun," I will now create Harlequin book titles.
- The Shortish Chancellor's Pregnant Crew
- The Rickety Czar's Pregnant Typist
- The Frowning Boater's Pregnant Cowgirl
- The Comatose Marmot's Pregnant Farmhouse
- The Remorseless Ophthalmologist's Pregnant Empress
- The Polytheistic Planter's Pregnant Puma
Wow. Vote for your favorites in the comments.