The bookstore got an amazing piece of postcard advertising last week for the book Knight Light: The Powerful Story of Virgin Mary's Husband by Roger L. Bennett. It's an autobiography.
Yes, everyone, this means what you think it does. Bennett says he was married to the Virgin Mary. In the '80s.
Knight Light is narrated by star-crossed lovers quaintly identified as HE and SHE. He is the author, fate-appointed Knight on a King's quest. She is the Queen Mother, Virgin Mary in contemporary guise. What they did after their church wedding in 1982 is told in sizzling detail as a Royal romp in the hay.
But it wasn't until the Immaculate Conception of 1986 that Roger Bennett's second wife chose to reveal Her eternal self for that ONE night only. That's when his silver seed was gathered for a mysterious purpose known only to Her and (perhaps, perhaps not) to that Black African race God's evolutionary plan determined to be first-in and last-out.
Afterward his wife vanished, never to be seen or heard from again. Out of respect for the Virgin Mary (not Her earthly name) Bennett waited over two decades before writing the most intimate sexual details of their lives together. But how else to tell this incredible story so readers have the facts on which to form their own conclusions? His respect for Her was further shown by remaining the faithful husband ever since.
My first question: the Virgin Mary chose to reveal herself during sex? From what I know of the Catholic church, that is not only kinda blasphemous, but also something no Catholics are allowed to do (despite their being married - in Catholicism, sex is always bad). What does this couple's sex life have to do with her being the Virgin Mary? I haven't a clue, and never will.
Second: Royal romp? Silver seed? That's all I need to say about that.
Personally, if my Spousal Unit vanished, I might, you know, be a little worried. Go looking for him. Call the police. You know, the things you typically do when a person just up and vanishes. But Bennett is nonplussed, and just says hey, that's what happens when your wife is the mother of Jesus.
You can read an excerpt from the first chapter here - I promise you, it's... something. In the first paragraph alone, he references Deliverance, The Only Living Boy in New York, and Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls. I don't know what kind of mood he's trying to set, but it's freaking me out.
Other books with "Knight Light" in the title:
Don't Forget the Knight Light by Tina Gagliardi
Now you know.