Deviant Dispatches

Halloween has gotten pretty ridiculous in some ways. (To be fair, so has Christmas.) Chuck & Beans I've been over the Drool-Inducing Costume of Uncreative Idiocy since before it started. Now, it's almost impossible to find a prepackaged women's costume that isn't  focused on getting laid as quickly as possible. We all get it: sexy mummy , sexy Mad Hatter , and sexy pizza are all a thing (NSFW links, duh). Try a different adjective; you're starting to sound like a bad romance novel. This is one of many reasons I prefer to craft my own costumes. I've always really enjoyed pushing boundaries and pretending to be someone I'm not. For example, these are some of my previous costumes. Tigger A hobo boy Princess Leia Ian Anderson of Jethro Tull Bonnie Parker of Bonnie and Clyde Beaker Sure, baring it all is bold and sassy. But I think it's bolder to think outside the conventional and be true to your inner badass. That's why I...

Today's a beautiful day in the neighborhood because there are some amazing books coming out that I've been anticipating for months. Sorrow's Knot by Erin Bow Bow's first book, Plain Kate, has totally enchanted my life. It's gorgeous writing (prosetry, more like) with a dark story and great characters. One of my favorite things about it was the shadow magic that was so crucial to the plot, which dark and creepy and everything I love in a ghost story. It's also why I'm glad Sorrow's Knot is focused on shadow magic. Binders are women who tie knotted cords that are full of magic, and the goal of these cords is to hold back the uneasy dead, who dwell in shadow. Otter, whose mother was also a binder, anticipates becoming a binder until her power turns and begins to tear her apart. Read some great reviews here , and if you're not convinced yet (which you should be), read an excerpt here . Hyperbole and a Half by Allie Brosh Hyperbole and a...

Happy Monday! Are you the big goat or the little goat? This morning, my head felt like the little one. I'd love another day off, but that would be greedy of me. I had a great weekend, with lots of reading, knitting, time with Spousal Unit, and a few hours of wool carding at the farm. "You're not allowed to have better facial hair than me. C'mere, let me nibble it." This is one of the sheep I helped shear in the spring... ...and this is the resulting wool, cleaned, dyed, and ready for carding. I made seven rovings, which can now be turned into yarn! I really like the cotton candy one. And the blue, purple, and green one. Arranging the flower box cornucopia, just like my mama taught me.

Troy Noir, Private Eye (Part I) The dame gives me the low-down on Paulson. "He's been a high-stakes gambler for years," she says between sips of wine. "Poor idiot doesn't know when to stop, though. So he pulls schemes like this to make it up." "Like what?" I ask. Going in, all I knew was he scammed like the best of them. No one mentioned this dame as his partner, either. "His latest one was trying to sell air. As in, the air we're breathing right now. Not one of his better schemes, but would you believe some people were falling for it?" I'm a little shocked as she pulls a bottle of wine from her purse. Granted, she's been putting them back, but I'd have figured her as a flask kinda girl. "He's near the tracks," she says, nodding toward the railway by the river. "When you find him, offer a glass of this. He won't be able to resist." "'Tears of the panther,...

It was a crisp day in early October, one of those that makes you glad you wore long johns, and also makes you wish for something with a little kick to warm your belly. I headed to the local joint to have a shot of whisky, but they were all out, so I had to settle for wine. I don't know why I go to that place. The wine made me look distinguished, but do I look like a guy who cares? I had bigger fish to fry. I was on the case, looking for the guy who skimmed my client in a ponzi scheme. Naturally, the cellar was the place to start, but my clues were few and the wine was weak, so I couldn't get the ideas flowing. I headed out back to see if I could find anything there. Sure enough, this dame's out back. She has a smile like she knows things, right? Like she's there for more than just the wine. Any other PI would have fallen for it, but I was focused. "What do you know about Paulson's set-up?" I asked her as she ran a hand through her red loc...

It was a good weekend for sunsets Pepin, Wisconsin

Holy carp. I'm going to turn 30 on my next birthday. Which means I'm 29 right now. It seems odd, but I haven't directly thought about that until now. Anyway. In the spirit of cutting myself some slack, I've decided some of my goals for this year need to be easier to achieve. Hopefully I'll get higher than a technically failing grade this year - I'd be satisfied with at least a D. 1. Pet a penguin (or at least have fun writing letters to zoos about why I should be allowed to). 2. Get three rejection letters for my novel. 3. Read at least 15 books during the year (my reading pace this year was pathetic, but that was due to the novel). Five should be from my to-read list on Goodreads, and one should be Isaac Asimov . 4. Read six books from six continents, plus something about Antarctica. 5. Make cannoli. 6. Make something Norwegian that I don't often make, like fruit soup or sandbakkels. 7. Make applesauce. 8. Get serious about house hunting a...